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Thag 19
PTS: Thag 1091-1145
Talaputa Thera: Talaputa
translated from the Pali by
Bhikkhu Khantipalo
© 2005
Alternate translation: Olendzki (excerpt)

#### I. Thoughts Before Going Forth

1. When, O when shall I live all alone in mountain caves, unmated with desire, clear seeing as unstable all that comes to be? This wish of mine, when indeed will it be? 2. When shall I, wearing the patchwork robes of color dun, be sage, uncraving, never making mine, with greed, aversion and delusion slain and to the wild woods gone, in bliss abide? 3. When shall I, this body seeing clear — unstable nest of dying and disease oppressed by age and death, dwell free from fear in the woods alone? When indeed will it be? 4. When indeed shall I dwell seizing the sharpened sword of wisdom made? When cut the craving creeper — breeder of fear, bringer of pain and woe, and twining everywhere? When indeed will it be? 5. When lion-like in the victor's stance shall I draw quick the sage's sword of wisdom forged and fiery might quick breaking Mara with his host? When indeed will it be? 6. When myself exerting, shall I be seen in goodly company of those esteeming Dhamma? Those with faculties subdued who see things as they are? Those who are 'Thus'? When indeed will it be? 7. When indeed will weariness not worry me — hunger, thirst and wind, heat, bugs and creeping things, while bent on my own good, the Goal, in Giribbaja's wilds? When indeed will it be? 8. When indeed shall I, self-mindful and composed win to that wisdom known by Him, the Greatest Sage, the Four Truths won within, so very hard to see? When indeed will it be? 9. When shall I, possessed of meditation's calm with wisdom see the forms innumerable, sounds, smells and tastes, touches and dhammas too, as a raging blaze? When will this be for me? 10. When shall I indeed, when with abusive words addressed, not be displeased because of that, and then again when praised be neither pleased because of that? When will this be for me? 11. When shall I indeed weigh as the same: wood, grass and creepers with these craved-for groups, both inner and external forms the dhammas numberless? When will it be for me? 12. When in the season of the black raincloud shall I follow the path within the wood trodden by those that See; robes moistened by new falling rain? When indeed will it be? 13. When in a mountain cave having heard the peacock's cry, that crested twice-born, bird down in the wood, shall I arise and collect together mind for attaining the undying? When indeed will it be? 14. When shall I, the Ganges and the Yamuna, the Sarasvati and the awful ocean mouth of the Balava-abyss, by psychic might untouching go across? When indeed will it be? 15. When shall I, like charging elephant unbound, break up desire for sensual happiness and shunning all the marks of loveliness strive in concentrated states? When indeed will it be? 16. When, as pauper by his debts distressed, by creditors oppressed, a treasure finds, shall I be pleased the Teaching to attain of the Greatest Sage? When indeed will it be?

#### II. Self-admonishments After Going Forth

17. Long years have I been begged by you 'Enough for you of this living in a house.' by now I have gone forth to homelessness what reason is there, mind, for you not to urge me on? 18. Was I not, O mind, assured by you indeed: 'The brightly plumaged birds on Giribbaja's peaks greeting the thunder, the sound of great Indra, will bring to you joy meditating in the wood?' 19. Dear ones and friends and kin within the family, playing and loving, sensual pleasures of the world: all have I given up and reached at last to this, even now, O mind, you are not pleased with me. 20. Mine you are, mind, possessed by none but me; why then lament when comes this time to arm? Seeing all as unstable this is now renounced: longing for, desirous of the Undying State. 21. Said He who speaks the best, Best among mankind, man-taming trainer, Physician Great indeed: 'Unsteady, likened to a monkey is the mind, extremely hard to check by not rid of lust.' 22. For varied, sweet, delightful are desires of sense; blind, foolish common men long have lain in them seeking after birth again, 'tis they who wish for ill, by mind they are led on to perish in hell. 23. 'In the jungle you should dwell, resounding with the cries of peacocks and herons, by pard and tiger hailed: Abandon longing for the body — do not fail' So indeed my mind you used to urge me on. 24. 'Grow in concentrations, the faculties and powers, develop wisdom-factors by meditation deep and then with Triple Knowledge touch the Buddha-sasana.' So indeed my mind you used to urge me on. 25. 'Grow in the Eightfold Way for gaining the Undying leading to Release and cleansing of all stains; Plunge to the utter destruction of all Ill!' So indeed my mind you used to urge me on. 26. 'Thoroughly examine the craved-for groups as Ill. Abandon that from which arises ill. Here and now make you an end of ill.' So indeed my mind you used to urge me on. 27. 'Thoroughly see inward the impermanent as ill, the void as without self, and misery as bane, and so the mind restrain in its mental wanderings.' So indeed my mind you used to urge me on. 28. 'Head-shaven and unsightly, go to be reviled, among the people beg with skull-like bowl in hand. To the Greatest Sage, the Teacher's word devote yourself.' So indeed my mind you used to urge at me on. 29. 'Wander well-restrained among the streets and families having a mind to sensual pleasures unattached, as the full moon shining clear at night.' So indeed my mind you used to urge me on. 30. 'You should be a forest-dweller, almsman too, a graveyard-dweller and a rag-robe wearer too, one never lying down, delighting in austerities.' So indeed my mind you used to urge me on. 31. As he who having planted trees about to fruit should wish to cut a tree down to the root: that simile you made, mind, that do you desire when on me urge the unstable and the frail. 32. Formless one, far-traveler, a wanderer alone, no more shall I your bidding do, for sense desires are ill, leading to bitter fruit, to brooding fear: with mind Nibbana-turned I shall walk on. 33. Not from lack of luck did I go forth, nor shamelessness, nor caused by mind's inconstancy, nor banishment nor caused by livelihood, and therefore I agreed with you, O mind. 34. 'Having few wishes, disparagement's abandoning, with the stilling of all ill is praised by goodly men' so indeed, my mind, then you urged at me, but now you go back to habits made of old. 35. Craving, unknowing, the liked and the disliked, delighting in forms and pleasing feelings too, dear pleasures of the senses — all have been vomited: never to that vomit can I make myself return. 36. In every life, O mind, your word was done by me, In many births I have not sought to anger you. That which within oneself produced by you, ingrate, long wandered on in ill create by you. 37. Indeed it is you, mind, makes us brahmanas, you make us noble warriors, kings and seers as well, sometimes it is merchant or workers become, or led by you indeed we come to gods' estate. 38. Indeed you are the cause of becoming titans too, and you are the root for becoming in the hells; sometimes there is going to birth as animals, or led by you indeed be come to ghosts' estate. 39. Not now will you injure me ever and again, moment by moment as though showing me a play, as with one gone mad you play with me — but how, O mind, have you been failed by me? 40. Formerly this wandering mind, a wanderer, went where it wished, wherever whim or pleasure led, today I shall thoroughly restrain it as a trainer's hook the elephant in rut. 41. He, the Master made me see this world — unstable, unsteady, lacking any essence; now in the Conqueror's Teaching, mind make me leap cross me over the great floods so very hard to cross! 42. Now it's not for you, mind, as it was before, not likely am I to return to your control — in the Greatest Sage's Sasana I have gone forth and those like me are not by ruin wrapped. 43. Mountains, seas, rivers, and this wealthy world, four quarters, points between, the nadir and the heavens all the Three Becomings unstable and oppressed. Where, mind, having gone will you happily delight? 44. Firm, firm in my aim! What will you do, my mind? No longer in your power, mind, nor your follower. None would even handle a double-ended sack, let be a thing filled full and flowing with nine streams. 45. Whether peak or slopes or fair open space or forest besprinkled with fresh showers in the Rains, where frequently are found boar and antelope, there will you delight to a grotto-lodging gone. 46. Fair blue-throated and fair-crested, the peacock fair of tail, wing-plumes of many hues, the passengers of air, greeting the thunder with fair-sounding cries will bring to you joy meditating in the wood. 47. When the sky-god rains on the four inch grass and on full-flowering cloud-like woods, within the mountains like a log I'll lie and soft that seat to me as cotton down. 48. Thus will I do even as a master should: Let whatever is obtained be enough for me, that indeed I'll do to you as energetic man by taming makes supple a catskin bag. 49. Thus will I do even as a master should; Let whatever is obtained be enough for me, by energy I'll bring you in my power as a skilled trainer the elephant in rut. 50. With you well-tamed, no longer turning round, like to a trainer with a straight running horse, I am able to practice the safe and blissful Path ever frequented by them who guard the mind. 51. I'll bind you by strength to the meditation-base as elephant to post by a strong rope bound; well-guarded by me, well-grown with mindfulness, you shall, by all becomings, be without support. 52. With wisdom cutting off wending the wrong path, by endeavor restrained, established in the Path, having seen the origin of passing, rising too — you will be an heir to the Speaker of the Best. 53. You dragged me, mind, as on an ox's round, in the power of the Four Perversions set; come now, serve the Great Sage, Compassionate, He the sure cutter of fetters and bonds. 54. As a deer roams in the very varied woods and goes to the pleasant crest garlanded by clouds, so there you will delight on that unentangled mount. There is no doubt, mind, you'll be established there. 55. Men and women enjoying any happiness controlled by thy desires and delighting in life, blind fools they are who comply with Mara's power, they driven on, O mind, servants are of thee.